Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Big Damn Summer Plans

Have come to grand realization!

I think that recently, I've fallen into too much of a routine; go to work, go to class, come home.  Rinse, lather, repeat with varying degrees of coffee and attentiveness. Not that there's anything wrong with routine, mind you. It keeps you going and I find mine to be hugely rewarding, and is something all the Metamucil commercials tell me to strive for.

But it's so routine.

So having realized I am unable to take the Big Damn Trip for lack of money, time, resources, I am replacing it with The Big Damn Summer.

Goals for the Big Damn Summer include trying brand spanking new things all the friggin' time. This means not only learning to drive and then going to trips to places (because that's always a good plan), but running around parks with people, going to concerts, taking trial lessons for new fads that Brooklyn comes up with, spontaneous beach trips, wandering the city at all hours of the day and night, playing new sports, and generally having an awesome time of awesome.

Real Quick, I Swear

So tomorrow/later today I'll explain to everyone about what Passover means to the Jews/My Family, but in the meantime I'm excited to share this new game plan for my summer.

I'm graduating from Queens in less than a month and a half and I've decided that it's about time, now that I have both a regents and a bachelors and my master's degree to get my driver's license. Because:

a) I'll have the time
b) I live in Manhattan-- if you can drive without crashing into people/cars/buildings here, you can drive anywhere
c) I'll be going through TEACH ME TEACH withdrawal and probably need something to distract me from the fact that for the first time in 18 years, I won't be in school for at least 6 hours of my week.

So starting whenever-the-heck-I-have-the-money/probably a few months after I graduate and get my tax return, I will be starting lessons to figure out what the heck I can do with a car in NYC.

Please commence recommendations on:

a) Cars
b) Driving schools
c) How good of an idea this is

Sunday, March 28, 2010

To Celebrate the Begining of Spring and the End of Winter

After the first Death Star was blown up, Lord Vader has a bit of a nervous break down. The storm troopers found him on Hoth making snow wookies and repeating "I'm a pretty sith! I'm a pretty sith!" over and over to himself.

The end was close at hand.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

The Pregnancy Pact

Is on LifeTime this Saturday. If I wasn't already scheduled to go to Miss Beth's and watch UFC?

Oh yeah. I'd totally be finding out "What possessed 18 young girls to get pregnant-" "You guys have to swear! You'll all get pregnant too!" "-AT THE SAME TIME?!"

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Anime Club: Come Watch a Show with the Librarian in My Purse

So Nancy Pearl came to me today and says (in her little librarian action figure voice):

"So, Clair, I want to watch a movie. We've been working on this giant project all day for the Friendly Neighborhood Wexis CompetitorWe should watch a movie. But I want to watch it with fun people, and for free, and I don't actually want to watch a movie, I want to watch something new and interesting and that I won't think to watch on my own. And anime. And maybe a little bit gay."

And I says to Nancy, I says: "Little lady, have I got a place for you."


Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Three Chapters of My Thesis: Down Like the Ground, Baby!

Yeah, that's right! You get partially finished, you stupid paper! Thought you'd show me, did you? Well, we'll see who's laughing now, won't we!

That's right! It's me! Because I've lost my damn mind over writing you and am talking entirely in Ali-like exclamation points!

And that ain't all, oh no boy! I've updated the archive that the paper is about! Because I am that hyped up right now and just that friggin' awesome with my damn self! 

I write like a grad student, sway like a tree! You think I need sleep? No, just more coff-eee!

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Remember the Jackie Chan Adventures?

Well, now you do. Presenting what I spent my night watching with the love and support of Kevin and Sean:



Apparently, Jackie Chan only did the voice for, well, himself during the first season. And then, as Kevin claims "he sounded too Asian and they got rid of him." IMDB seems to confirm.

I hope somewhere out there, Jackie Chan drop kicked someone for that.

And then there was the Fantastic Four cartoon. Where Sue did nothing except get kidnapped and pout and monologue out loud to herself. As a lovely little note before you force yourself to watch the Fantastic Four video?

Stan Lee animated himself into the "Previously, on the Fantastic Four" part of the cartoon. And voiced himself. I love you, you crazy, awesome, crazy old man. 

Excelsior!





Friday, March 19, 2010

I Knew I Forgot Something!

In today's economic climate, it's more important than ever to trust in the strength of the system and your government. Remember-- keep spending, keep saving, keep growing the economy and encouraging more jobs to come back into this star system.



I am pleased to announce 200,000 jobs being opened up this spring to begin work on a brand new space station/small moon. Full time, competitive salary, 20 vacation days a year, full health care and dental.

The Empire is an Equal Opportunity Employer (excluding rebel scum).

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Kiss Me, I'm Awesome

New York smells like drunk college chicks.

Happy St. Patrick's Day. Now go and be a little bit less publicly drunk for another year.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Alice in Wonderland Part-ah

The lovely Petrina is going to rock out with her petticoats out at the Wonderland in Spring Ball this Friday at Galapagos Space in Brooklyn. Because she's awesome (and doesn't want to go home with a stranger/anyone stranger than me) I'm going too!

Which means it's costume time!

New Discovery: When going to a ball whose major theme is hysteria and lunacy, all you need to do to have a costume is the following:

1) Pick mismatched patterns
2) Layer skirts
3) Thigh high socks
4) Wear a corset

Pretty much anything looks good with a corset. Heads up.  I am so going to look like a lunatic on the A Train at four AM. And totally cool with that.

Monday, March 15, 2010

In Which I See Kick Ass and Create a Narrative for a Librarian Action Figure

So the lovely Peter and Petrina (or P2E2 as no one calls them) gave me Nancy Pearl in a Box for Christmas. And while she has been doing lovely in the box, I've decided that just like spring means I can show my legs again, it should mean that Nancy gets a little play time. 


Presenting the first installment of Nancy Pearl's Travels.

(Dear Real Nancy Pearl, please don't sue me.  I love you and your sensible shoes so very much.)

After getting paid last Tuesday, Nancy and I are broke. Mad broke. Empty sad wallet broke. How, I asked, will we have an awesome time tonight? With no moneys for spending? How, Nancy, how? 

No moneys does not deter Nancy Pearl, LIBRARIAN ACTION FIGURE!



Saturday, March 13, 2010

Young Adult Services Symposium, or, How I Learned Something Before Noon on a Saturday

So this morning at 10 AM, while most of you were sleeping, myself, Miss Beth, and Sarah Couri from Teen Central were out bettering ourselves.

Be jealous.

Ramblings too long? Kriss Kross will make you jump, jump.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Pollen, Dander, Dust

Today's "Darth Vader is Not Amused" has been brought to you by NerdSherpa.

Little known fact: Darth Vader actually wears the mask to deal with his terrible hay fever. It's the Future Version of Claritin-D. When you mock him for it, you mock every allergy sufferer.

(And risk his throat-crushing wrath. Fair warning.)

Pic originally found on Jlist. If you know the original artist, high five them for me.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

TV on the Internet? How Droll.

I have a cable box and all the love that comes along with it; I'm an addict, and unless my finances drastically change and I can no longer afford it, I am going to keep my lovely Time Warner box with its DVR function and giant friggin' remote with too many buttons.

But even I know this is awesome: Clicker.Com.

Presenting one website that tells you exactly what shows are online and links you to where you can find them. No more searching SurftheChannel versus Hulu versus AlluC. Now you can look at one website, see where the heck your favorite episode of StarTrek the Original Series is, and watch it.

It's like the TV Guide channel without the irritating peppy little programs being shown in the top half of your screen.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

New Professional Org. Memberships

I have them. I am now a member of:

AALL-- American Association of Law Librarians
ALA-- American Library Association
-Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgendered Round Table
-Federal and Armed Forces Libraries Round Table
-Library Research Round Table
ACRL-- Association of College and Research Libraries
-College Libraries Committee
-University Libraries Committee
-Law and Political Science Committee
NYLA-- New York Library Association
YALSA-- Young Adult Library Services Association

And paying for all but one of them all by my lonesome. After a wonderful conversation yesterday with a law librarian from Thompson and Knight I learned the following:

"It's not who you know. People say that, but it's not true. It's not who you know, it's who you can keep thinking about you, and what they think. Every job I've ever gotten was because I joined local professional organizations and went to things and spread my face around and let people know I was looking for a job. And I've gotten fired a lot in my life-- trust me on this."

Good advice, kindly mentor. Good advice.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Text Me Money

So the Brooklyn Public Library has recently set up a system where, similar to the Haiti Donations, you can give to the library via text message. Text once, donate $10 to the BPL via a charge on your end of the month bill.

This brings up two very interesting ideas for me:

1) How amazing that we've evolved as librarians to the point where instead of scoffing at text messages as a way of delivering information and funds (the way some more traditional librarians have-- I'm looking at you Michael Gorman, and glaring politely in disgust), we've embraced this "new" technology as a legitimate means of growing and reaching more users. This shows a modernness and a focus on patron needs that I am proud to be a part of as a profession.

and 2)
Where can I get me one of these "text this number and I get money" phone #s? Because I could use a new set of tea cups, and this sounds promising.

Friday, March 5, 2010

I Think They Sell These Downstairs from my Office

The best part about this image, aside from the fact that it has somehow made Lady Liberty badass?

It makes me think of the Planet of the Apes Musical.

And the song that I maybe remembered more words to than I'd care to admit:

Troy: Oh my God, I was wrong
It was Earth all along

You've finally made a monkey
Apes: Yes, we've finally made a monkey

Troy: Yes, you've finally made a monkey out of me

Apes: Yes, we've finally made a monkey out of you

Troy: I love you, Dr. Zaius!

Somewhere out there, Darth Vader is pissed that he's sharing his weekly spotlight with Troy MacClure. I'm so dead.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Otaku Take Over!

This week is the Otaku Take Over at Teen Central, and I'm having a blast running around with teenagers and acting my (internal geekboy) age.

There are free books for giveway (including one of the Beka Cooper series, from my favorite crossdressing-knights-are-love author Tamora Pierce), video games, anime, Sailor Moon, and some of the most badass teens you'll ever met.

Yesterday was an awesometastic mashup of the Gay Straight Alliance and the Anime Club, where we watched Sailor Moon and talked about how Haruka was really, really hot. I learned a tonnage of new stuff (yaoi apparently translates to "without a point," a reference to the fact that it originally started out as gratuitous porn; yuri means "flower" because as it was so aptly explained "Because flowers look like vaginas!").

Today was gaming day. Here I am challenging Miss Beth at Naruto, while our helpful teacher announces our Ultimate Showdown.

IN THIS CORNAH, HAILING FROM WAY THE HELL UP THE ISLAND, IN THE FUZZY EARS AND BROWN REARS, CLAIR THE MURDERBRARIAN!

AND IN THIS CORNAH, HAILING FROM JACKSON HEIGHTS, BLOND AND BEAUTIFUL AND BAD ASS, MISS BETH THE INTERN-AL BLEEDER!

Beth whooped me. Solidly. And fun was had by all.

Tomorrow is Misako Rocks! and fun with Cosplay and drawing. If you're NY Based and age-range appropriate, come on down to Teen Central at the Grand Central Branch of the NYPL. It's so awesome.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Mint: Saving Me from Bankruptcy One Day at a Time

From the lovely folks who brought you TurboTax, we now have:

(See what I did there?)

You sign up, enter your bank account information (yeah, I know, but trust me on this one), and Mint tells you where all that money you made last month went, with spending categories, business names, and average amount spent over a given period.

It also keeps track of planned expenses and since it ties right into your accounts, you never have to update your depressingly static Excel Spreadsheet with "Spent ten dollars more on beer this month, crap."

It'll let you know when you're above or below budget, emails your warnings when you do something hinky, tells you how much you can save over the course of a month, year, etc. if you keep going this way, and provides handy little (advertisements) ways to save money.

I feel fiscally sound already.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Wonderful Conversation of the Day

Miss Beth: Oh, happy birthday!

Girl-Whos-Birthday-It-Was: Thank you! I'm 32.

Miss Beth: That's great!

GWBIW: Yeah, and today's my sister's birthday, too!

Miss Beth: Oh wow, your mother is...

GWBIW: She's 22.

Miss Beth: ...reliable.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Intent To Graduate Forms: Not my New BFF

So apparently, finishing all of my classes isn't enough of a "IMMA GET ME THE HELL ON OUTTA HERE" hint for Queens College. I had to fill out an Intent to Graduate Form.

Of course, today was the last day to do so.

Of course I didn't realize this until I got the email at 5:00PM on my Crackberry.

Hilarity ensued. As did prolific use of the "woobie face," the quick-like-the-bunny walk, and repeating fast tempo songs on Shiny the iPod. All combining together to leave me unpleasantly exhausted over a slip of paper no bigger than my pay stub.

But rest assured that come June I will be "an idiot with a degree." All is right with the world.